“You need to learn how to select your thoughts just the same way you select your clothes every day. This is a power you can cultivate.” – Elizabeth Gilbert
There’s a more intimate force at play in our financial lives: our own inner dialogue. The voice in our head that critiques our every financial move, that whispers doubts and fears about our money management abilities. This inner critic can be a formidable obstacle on the path to financial well-being.
The inner critic is born from a place of self-protection. It wants to keep us safe from the pain of failure, from the sting of loss. But in its zealous efforts, it can overstep, transforming from a cautious advisor to a tyrannical dictator. It can paralyse us with indecision, convincing us that every financial choice is make-or-break. It can flood us with shame over past mistakes, overshadowing the lessons we’ve learned and the progress we’ve made.
So how do we contend with this inner adversary? The antidote, as Gilbert hints at, is self-compassion.
Self-compassion is the practice of treating ourselves with the same kindness, understanding, and forgiveness that we would offer a good friend. It’s acknowledging that perfection is an illusion, that missteps are part of the human experience.
In the context of personal finance, self-compassion might look like:
- Recognizing that everyone makes financial mistakes and has room for improvement. You’re not alone in this journey.
- Reframing “failures” as opportunities for growth and learning. Every setback contains a lesson.
- Celebrating your financial victories, no matter how small. Every step in the right direction is worthy of acknowledgment.
- Speaking to yourself with encouragement and understanding, rather than criticism and condemnation.
- Seeking help and education when you need it, rather than berating yourself for not having all the answers.
We advise, you thrive. At WellsFaber, we understand that financial well-being is as much about inner work as it is about outer strategy. We’re not just here to help you navigate the technicalities of personal finance; we’re here to support you in developing a healthy, compassionate relationship with your money.
As you continue on your financial journey, remember Gilbert’s wisdom. You have the power to choose your thoughts, to cultivate a mindset that supports rather than sabotages your financial well-being. When your inner critic pipes up, meet it with the gentle understanding of a wise friend. Remind yourself that you’re doing your best, that every day presents a new opportunity to make choices aligned with your values and goals.
Financial growth, like personal growth, is not a linear ascent. There will be ups and downs, victories and setbacks. But by practising self-compassion, by choosing thoughts that uplift and empower, you weather the storms with resilience. You create a financial life built not on self-criticism, but on self-respect, self-trust, and self-love.
So as you ponder your next financial move, take a moment to check in with your inner dialogue. Are you speaking to yourself as a harsh critic or a compassionate ally? Remember, the most important investment you can make is in your own well-being – financial and emotional alike.